Tales from the ER

Cops have hard jobs, particularly in Information Age America. In fact, the argument could be made that theirs is literally an impossible task. They work among the most dysfunctional members of our society, can be attacked and killed at any moment and then have their actions and decisions dissected in microscopic detail in retrospect from positions of comfort and security. Well, at least you can get rich doing it. Or not …

I have a friend who was a career cop outside Seattle. He was once called to a scene as backup after two other cops were having difficulty subduing a suspect in the midst of a “mental health crisis.” What he found on arrival was a naked man vigorously attacking the two on-scene officers, tearing their uniforms to pieces and clawing like a rabid weasel.

They had already deployed two Tasers and two cans of OC spray to no effect. When not actively trying to eat the two policemen, this insane drug-addled lunatic was slamming his own head against the asphalt in a failed effort at making the voices go away. The only way my buddy got the guy to calm down long enough to get handcuffs on him was to grab his testicles vigorously and twist.
Most cops likely gravitate toward the job for the glamor …